And so we begin a new journey! This time we have some returning faces/hearts and some new faces/hearts adding to our colorful friendship. My expectancy grows evermore as I wonder what He has in store for us...
Many of you aren't able to attend the study this time around. So, I am glad the blog is available to you. I love keeping the discussion going throughout the week, and I hope this avenue of communication allows those of you who can't attend an opportunity to still participate. I invite you to share your thoughts, always remembering this is a safe place to share when you feel prompted. I love others to share because I know I have only ONE perspective of how the discussions move. It's nice to see what OTHERS see, and it only makes our friendship grow deeper.
Many of you aren't able to attend the study this time around. So, I am glad the blog is available to you. I love keeping the discussion going throughout the week, and I hope this avenue of communication allows those of you who can't attend an opportunity to still participate. I invite you to share your thoughts, always remembering this is a safe place to share when you feel prompted. I love others to share because I know I have only ONE perspective of how the discussions move. It's nice to see what OTHERS see, and it only makes our friendship grow deeper.
Forgiveness + Healing + Transformation = LIFE
John 10:10 - "I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of."
We certainly dove right on it at the last two meetings! Kathy recommended keeping a journal to jot down questions or thoughts that come to each of us throughout the week. I may fill an entire book this time!!! haha. Here is a glimpse of our discussion:
- What forgiveness is NOT: forgetting, excusing, fixing, instantaneous, about losing, always reconciliation, having an expectation for others to change
- We received an excerpt from Elieen Guder's To Live In Love (I'm trying to figure out how to post this on the blog)
- Kathy recommended some scripture to meditate. Matthew 6:12-15, Matthew 18: 15-18, Matthew 18:21-22
- We also discussed understanding value regarding God's forgiveness and our forgiveness toward others. How are they related?? If I don't feel worthy/valued in God forgiving me, how could I possibly begin to understand forgiving others??? (back to The Apple)
- Sin...what is it?? Definition: Missing the mark or dis-ease. Forgiveness boosts the immune system, while lack of forgiveness suppresses the immune system.
- What are some sins I think others have committed against me? What are some sins I have committed?
- Some things that block forgiveness: pride, not wanting to be vulnerable, righteousness, not wanting to face suffering/pain, vengeance.
- Some questions to contemplate: 1) Do I need to forgive myself? In what areas am I unable to forgive myself? What is it about those areas make it difficult for me to accept God's forgiveness?
- Lastly, we all chose one rock from a basket, which was to represent any lack of forgiveness you are holding. Carry the rock to remind you this week. And when you are ready...let it go and tell someone you did.
For next week's discussion....Forgiving God. (and we are going to watch the movie Chocolat!)
Wow. We covered a lot! So much to chew on. I'm still holding my rock, by the way.
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One thing that sticks out for me about this post (and keep in mind, I haven't been part of the study yet, so you may have already covered this)...
ReplyDeleteBut when you stated that forgiveness is NOT...forgetting. How does one reconcile this with the verse in 1 Corinthians 13:5 when it says "love keeps no record of wrongs"?
In other words, how does one keep no record of wrongs without forgetting?
Good question, M. I'll have to think more. Just another thought that came to my mind last night.
ReplyDeleteIs forgiving a form of submission?
Thank you J for your encouraging comment at Wrinkled Time. Wishing I could meet with all of you on the forgiveness topic...it's SO BIG and SO important and I know I'm missing a lot of rich dialogue.
ReplyDeleteA few thoughts in response to M and J's comments.
I'm wondering if "remembering" is different than keeping a "record of wrongs."? The second seems more intentional, where a memory may just be stuck in our minds whether we choose it to be there or not. I think you can truly let go of a wrong (with God's grace) but still remember.
For me, when the memory no longer "stings" when I think about it, or I am able to share it without heart racing and tears, then I know healing has happened. Isn't forgiveness a form of healing, or at least healing a result of forgiveness?
Yes, I would think forgiving is an act of submission. We have to step out of our "want to" for both. "Give" is in one word and "sub" in the other. I think both require humility.
Miss y'all!
Great questions friends and great responses! I am blessed just by reading these. I have been thinking about forgiveness SO much these past 2 weeks-especially as I look at this rock that sits on my counter. More on that another time though.
ReplyDeleteI do believe forgiveness is submitting to the Lord's will....He really seems to be the only one who knows what it feels like to be COMPLETELY free from unforgiveness and the consequences that come with it. I know He desires for me to have that freedom and why I believe he 'commands' us to forgive (Mark 11:25, Col 3:12-13, etc).
I think of the "keeping records" as those tally marks we speak about. Does God know what we have done, yes. Does he hold it against us or use it against us? No. He does not weigh our good verses bad. Personally speaking....I have not forgotten all of the hurts my MIL has done toward me over the years, but I will not keep tally and I try hard not to let those past offenses impact those that are more recent. I have no idea if that is coming out right, but in my head I know what I want to say. Sorry.
Hoping others post....would love to read your thoughts on this too!
While reviewing my notes from Monday night I found something that I wrote down but didn't actually hear. Unforgiveness causes physical illness - cancer. Oh my, that's me! I had an ongoing (daily for years), very intense situation with a close family member. It escalated and I was very hurt and purposefully held onto the hurt even as the situation began to change positively. Then I was absolutely blindsided with a cancer diagnosis that was unexplainable. I took a big rock from the basket last week so that I would reflect on if I had taken responsibility for my part in this conflict and to make sure that there was forgiveness in my heart for this person. In light of all the healing and grace God has shown me, I absolutely will not hold on to any bitterness or unforgiveness any longer:) Forgiveness is a decision. And now I'm left wondering "did my unforgiveness cause my cancer?"
ReplyDeleteJane,
ReplyDeleteYour question is so bold, real and honest. I feel honored to be part of this discussion.
I'm often left wondering about the why's of Colin's health and circumstances as well. Believe it or not, I speak directly of how my choices may have had an affect on his health condition. Your question makes ME wonder if sometimes we are blinded to the answers so as to only rely on Him even more. We all know that He wants us and US ALONE...nothing else. I know when Colin's was diagnosed I felt stripped in an instant! I was left with me...the real me...the real me with God ALONE. There is clarity in that. And, where there is clarity - there is trasnparency. And, where there is transparency - there is God shining through.
Thanks for being so clear and bold...He shines right through. Hugs.
I am sorry I missed you all last week - I am looking forward to Tuesday - and Chocolate. I went up to Communion 2 Sundays ago but as I rummaged around in my purse at the beginning of Mass I stumbled upon " the rock". There it was hard and cold just like it had been when I dropped it in there. . . . I don't know the Scripture and verse but here I was ready to go to Communion when it came to me - again- clear things up with your brother and THEN approach me. . . hhhmmm I decided to drop the rock and go to Communion.
ReplyDeleteA couple of funny things "happened" my brother called me right after Mass. hhmmm. We had a conversation- chit chat but a conversation none the less. I put the whole thing out of my mind till later in the week rmmaging around in my huge purse again - there's the rock - again. I smiled as I relized my forgiveness is an ongoing process and " the rock" will always be in my "purse " in one form or another. I can gather resentments daily if I am not maintaining my spiritual contact. . . .
"Resentment eats it's container"
(heard at a 12-step meeting)